One priest thinks he has cracked the code for vocational discernment with youth — young men in particular — and, no surprise, the framework comes straight from Jesus.
Aleteia spoke with Fr. Matthew Gonzalez and received input from three men he works with -- high school students who attend St. Bartholomew Catholic Church in Scotch Plains, New Jersey. Asked “How would you explain to other young men being open to God’s calling?” they respond:
“I would tell them just to trust the process. There will be ups and downs, but if you trust God and His hopes, you will get through anything.” (Fabian Roman-Gaud)
“Just trust in His plan for you … He will lead you where you need to go and give you the messages you need to hear. Put your trust in Him, and your life [including important decisions, like your vocational state in life] will be revealed to you as you go …” (Steven Badilla)
“See it not just as His calling, but your own calling. To be called by God doesn’t mean needing to become a priest; to be called by Him means to follow your own destiny that He has set out for you. Being open to that destiny — it’s not just a random occurrence, but a chance to really throw away your mask and be your most true self …” (Damien Baez Feliciano)
Sons of Thunder
It all started in 2024, when Fr. Matthew was pastor at St. Bartholomew’s. “Sons of Thunder” is not your average vocations’ ministry according to Archdiocesan Communications Manager Sean Quinn, who wrote a JerseyCatholic.org article on it in November 2025.
“While it does offer the usual prayer opportunities and seminary visits, the Sons of Thunder core focus goes much deeper. It’s about teaching the boys what it means to be a modern Catholic man — a mission Fr. Gonzalez believes is more crucial than ever.”
Fr. Matthew, now rector at Newark’s Cathedral Basilica of the Sacred Heart 20 miles to the east, shared that after some young men returned from the Quo Vadis diocesan young men’s summer camp, they wanted to keep it going, growing in their experience with God and each other.
The priest started gathering them monthly, inviting others, with the simple structure of faith, fellowship, and service -- encouraging the men to help decide specifics.
“The whole pattern,” he explained, “comes from a few verses in Mark’s Gospel, Chapter 3:13-19. Jesus goes up a mountain, and whenever he does that, it’s to pray. Then he calls the Twelve by name which points to the relational piece with God and then one another. Then Jesus gives them the authority to preach and to heal and they’re sent on mission to go serve others.”
First, prayer and growing in relationship with God and practicing virtue. The boys decided to prayer Evening Prayer together from the Liturgy of the Hours and share some time in group discussion.
Second, for fellowship, the group enjoys sports and outdoor games, “an aspect of growing as human beings, having fun, getting to know each other and growing in brotherhood.”
Third, service, which has taken a variety of different forms from beach cleanup to gardening projects at a nearby cloistered convent, to helping local Knights of Columbus with work they had undertaken, and helping raise funds for elderly in need.
When it came time to name the group, Sons of Thunder was a hit right away. One of them knew right away that it was the nickname Jesus had given the brother-apostles James and John.
“It’s really about Jesus who saw something in these men — their zeal, their passion, their missionary spirit.” Fr. Matthew said Jesus held and honed those qualities to make them the great saints they became. “They guys love that it’s a strong name, too.”
Men like me
“Sons of Thunder” started organically and further developed in 2025, really “taking shape and bringing in more members.”
Responding to how participation has helped their relationship with God and the Church to grow, the same three young men responded:
“I’m just motivated to be a lot more involved at St. Barts because I know there are men like them there with me.” (Fabian)
“Being able to see my brothers in the group and just pray together and do things together — it feels like God put us there for that reason, of giving ourselves a chance to blossom and grow … I don’t just blossom with them; it feels like I blossom and grow with God and the Church.” (Steven)
“It has grown significantly since I joined the Sons of Thunder. We are always helping others around us [by serving] but also praying for those in need.” (Damien)
We need a relationship to be able to listen
Fr. Matthew energetically revealed how this framework “is really key to my whole thought on vocation … How we build a culture of vocations in a parish or diocese, and specifically with Sons of Thunder." He said it seems to “crack the code on reaching young people in general, but also when it comes to vocations.”
“First of all, God has a plan in mind for you. He calls you by name, but we have to be in relationship to listen. We also have to be in relationship with others in community, and we need to go out in service using our gifts.”
When Fr. Matthew looks at his own vocational discernment journey he sees these same elements, “Not in such a clean-packaged way, but throughout my life I can pinpoint all three elements, which did eventually lead me to say yes to becoming a priest.”
Growing up in a devoted Catholic family and attending Catholic elementary school, foundations were laid for the pillar of prayer. “It was the air we breathed at home. It wasn’t anything strange, or foreign or forced.”
Besides prayer in school, he said the relational (fellowship) pillar has many layers — family, friends, and mentors. Fr. Matthew recalled “the first person” he can pinpoint as planting the seed of a priestly vocation, his 3rd-grade religion teacher.
“I’ll never forget it; it’s that vivid. She was teaching a class on vocations and at the end asked if anyone in the class felt like they might be called the priesthood… Before it was an intellectual move for me, it was a feeling.
“I had never thought about that question, but I wanted to raise my hand.”
He said he sheepishly looked around the room to see if anyone else was twitching, but even though he realized he was the only one, young Matthew felt compelled: “I gotta do this. I don’t know why, but I did it.”
Those three pillars showed up again in high school when Fr. Matthew went from attending youth group to being one of the youth leaders. When “you’re offering service, using your gifts to build up the Kingdom, that’s when the possibility of a priestly vocation awakened again,” in a more powerful way. He admitted that he didn’t have a crystal-clear sense of God’s will but by the time he graduated knew he needed to intentionally discern.
Year after year in the seminary, “I just kept coming back until I realized this is what God’s calling me to.”
Fr. Matthew says he is grateful for the support he always had from family. In fact, his mother had an intuition of her son’s call to the priesthood from an early age. “So I had to discern whether this was my mother’s ‘vocation’ or mine …working through that in spiritual direction I came to realize it was her intuitive sense coming from a place of love.”
We need to shift the paradigm
Ordained for the Archdiocese of Newark in 2022, Fr. Matthew acknowledged the reality of “analysis-paralysis” in regard to vocational discernment.
“I think we need to shift the paradigm … when we talk to young people, even older folks, our mind and verbiage often goes straight to ‘state in life’ vocations… It is part of the process, but it’s only one part.
“If we can start with the story that God is writing” in each life -- a story that finds its place within the entire story of salvation, “you come along because he needs you to do something only you can do, in a unique and unrepeatable way. And that’s what vocation is.”
He summarizes that it’s like God’s speaking creation into existence, “God has spoken into your life … He’s gifted you, and he’s sending you on a mission specific to this time and this place in the world."
“We start there, and now we’re talking about an adventure.”
Fr. Matthew said his experience is that when the starting question is “state in life vocation,” this stirs up stress and anxiety; “but when we’re following a story” of how God created us — with our gifts, motivations and desires — “then we’re just saying little yeses, every single day,” until the big picture comes into view.
This also, he has seen, “gives young men a sense of purpose. God made you on purpose for a purpose …”
At that basic level it’s less about whether you’re called to be married, or a priest, or religious, it’s simply that every person has a purpose and you live responding to God’s invitation to adventure of living that out.
Where this shift of mindset leads is to “mold their imaginations. Young people’s imaginations are being molded right now by technology, by social media … When we bringing their imaginations to a sense of calling, adventure and purpose, than the doors open to all the possibilities of what that might be.”
In the young men’s own words, Sons of Thunder has impacted their personal and spiritual lives as “much bigger than just a religious group,” Steven said. “I don’t just feel like a member but rather a leader — a leader who can inspire others to do their own good in the world.”
Damien added that coming together with the common interests of “God and making our faith stronger … every time we meet, I learn something new from everyone.”
For Fabian, Sons of Thunder has always been a group of close friend, “who are also young guys just like me, getting together and always getting the vibes right. It’s … given me so much hope and strength; knowing that I have people like them in my life motivates me to keep going.”
